I woke up at 9, made and ate breakfast (toast), watched an episode of Parks and Recreation which is the fluffiest, feel-goodiest show I know. And I then I had to go lay back down for two hours because I was exhausted from the strain of eating and sitting up and concentrating on the plot of a half hour sitcom.
I had already seen that episode.
I took a shower (crying uncontrollably while washing your hair? Achievement unlocked.) and then sat on the couch for an hour and a half because the act of getting myself clean is tiring.
I had plans of going to visit friends so I got dressed and brushed my hair and teeth while my legs shook from the strain of standing and then called them. They were taking naps. I started crying on the phone because driving 30 minutes to go see them, spending time talking to people, and then driving 30 minutes back seems absolutely insurmountable and I told him as much.
My friend told me “do what you need to do to make you happy, Kammah” and, I mean, how can I do that?
How can I be happy when it’s taken me six hours to get ready to leave the house and I haven’t even made it to the front door?